I have been struggling a bit lately, with my focus and routine.
I have a lot of things that I do, creatively, for work, and as hobbies. As a result of that nature, I frequently have to tidy everything to keep it flowing into a productive place. It is an effort all unto its own. Otherwise, my everyday existence is very much like a trainwreck with boxcars overturned everywhere and their contents spilled—half finished projects here, a pile of mess-to-be-organized-there, a sketchbook full of new ideas staring at me, my brain going in too many directions of to-do’s and inspiration. This breeds an ever increasing feeling of unraveling. If left unchecked, it goes on indefinitely into what some would certainly call madness. A significant piece of my life has been managing this, otherwise nothing gets done, and that is a whole other spiral we will not get into!
I think this most recent phase all began when my workspaces had to be completely dismantled and moved for some renovation and deep cleaning. Most of August was spent in this period of disarray, and I am now, in the middle of September finally getting everything back together—with the blessed Virgo new moon, no less! I could see the physical disorganization in front of me, while the mental disorganization plagued me day and night.
My dream just last night involved a house that I was moving out of, full of my things that were supposed to be out that very day. Nothing was packed, and stuff was everywhere. My landlord was following me around complaining about it all as I was trying to pick everything up and move it out. I did actually laugh at the absurdity in the dream when I kept finding half-knitted hats in corners. Now I am trying to remember their patterns because they were very pretty! A total anxiety-ridden dream!
Alas!
I have devoted this week to getting everything sorted and off my mind, so that I can focus again fully on my work. Keeping an artist’s workspace organized is a beast of an effort. There are so many little pieces of things everywhere—materials, notebooks, projects, reference items, endless ephemera—no matter how minimal one claims to be. It’s just how it goes. And when that becomes disorganized, well, I can see where the monster myth may have originated. It is like living with a monster, and now he needs to be folded and sorted back into his box!
All of this is reality when someone focuses on one art. As I opened this writing with, I have many. How I live with that is another writing on its own. I must keep spaces tidy for silversmithing, beading, quilting, clothes-making in knitting and sewing, painting sometimes very large canvases, product photography of the aforementioned things, computer space for editing and writing. It’s a lot for anyone involved and sometimes I feel like an octopus. Empty of these outlets, however, I become very bored and unhappy so keeping all of this clean and productive is simply a necessary, very important, part of my life.
It has just been a little more overwhelming than usual, lately, and I am writing to say I can finally see the end in sight! Clean, organized workspaces ready for creating. The busy fruitfulness of summer is now being harvested and put into place for a winter of focus. I love how that works.